Laughter & smiles hidden behind the dark clouds.

- I flung my A.Maths test. (I left about 4 questions blank! :o)
- Mother Tongue Paper 2, just in time to complete.
- I flung my Social Studies paper. (Booohooo, sadsadsad. T.T I was startled by the first question. 2nd question, after writing one paragraph, did I realise I made a mistake. :'[ )
- I did not attend badminton training for the very first time.

Upcoming event will be the celebration of Singapore's birthday! :D 8 August'08 will be out of school for some Connect Singapore event. Whoo hoo, quite much of anticipation! ;)

I feel so vunerable.

My once passion for badminton, it doesn't seem to exist now. I feel sorry. Badminton, once again made me tear. I don't know what's worrying me. I'm just afraid of attending. Could someone tell me why? :( Very vividly, I remembered I cried during a tournament. What's more during a match. The fear of letting people down. The nervousness I never overcome. Having made a lot of mistakes. I'm disappointed.

I know myself very well. I never had overcome my fear during any matches. Be it friendly match, mixed double matches in school (eg, last year badminton "camp") or tournament. I made mistakes. For instance, paired with Mr.Shah, all the shots trying to lift/net, I simply missed every single one of them. I tremble. My heartbeat jumps a skip.

Do I give some of you the impression that I love badminton a lot a lot?
Do I give some of you the impression that I am very enthusiastic over badminton a lot a lot?
Do I give some of you the impression that for me to skip a badminton training session, it is that difficult? If I skipped once, the sky will be falling?

I do agree that it is very tough for me to skip a badminton training session. It takes me a lot of courage to skip once. It makes my heartbeat pumps fast. The part on making a decision, Im always in a dilemma. My decision always wavers. I never come to a conclusion always. I will always be thinking yes?no?yes?no?ahhhh! I dont know. :((

Okay, enough of my rantings. Let this be my last sad disappointed post. :D Not sure if I'm up to it, but I will try. :) I hope this will be the last.

I wanna be like Yongkian, always updating cheerful entries! :D